Authenticity

Authenticity is a word that seems to appear everywhere at the moment, carrying a great deal of meaning and weight — how to be authentic, speak our truth, listen to our deeper self. Yet much of what circulates on social media feels surface‑level, offering little real guidance on how one actually lives authentically, especially when the implication is that authenticity is something we lack. It makes me wonder whether I should step back from social media altogether.

It opens a question for me: what is authenticity, really? Is it one thing, always the same, or does it shift with our inner landscape? Is it a fixed truth, or something that reveals itself in degrees, moment by moment?

My understanding is that we are more authentic when we are more coherent within ourselves. When, as my teacher used to say, our thoughts, our words and our actions are aligned. It sounds good and it makes perfect sense, however sometimes we find ourselves, not quite knowing what we are thinking, expressing words that are not quite conveying what we are feeling, and acting out emotions that we haven’t quite fully understood or digested. Are we authentic then? Are we still authentic when we are aware of this dissonance? Authentic to who though, ourselves or those we interact with, or both?

Open Both Hands

Brené Brown explains authenticity as “not something we have or don’t have. It’s a practice – a conscious choice of how we want to live. Authenticity is a collection of choices that we have to make every day. It’s about the choice to show up and be real. The choice to be honest. The choice to let our true selves be seen.’

When life happens however, we might not always feel like we do have a choice as we are swept away by life’s happenings. We do the best that we can do in the moment. Perhaps in those moments it is less a choice but more a habitual response. To me this speaks directly to the idea of ‘free will’ and that in fact we have none. Other than a choice in how much effort we make and how much discipline we practise in coming closer to ourselves. Otherwise, everything plays out as it has already been set in motion to do so.

This is a subject too big for these pages but perhaps the best that we can do is to continue to practice being present.

-       Be present as you take the next breath and practice being a witness to yourself – honestly checking in and appreciating your current starting point.

-       Be present and brave to notice when things fall out of alignment, when you don’t quite turn up as you would have like to.

-       Appreciate the fluctuations of your mind and be kind to yourself - accommodate the unwanted thoughts and feelings, and follow with responsive action.

-       Bring the practice of mindfulness intentionally and consistently into your daily live. Yoga not just on the mat but off the mat. Especially off the mat.

-       Make a commitment to yourself to stay present and a witness to yourself. Develop a formal practice of mindfulness and stick to it – however it manifests each day. There’s no right or wrong way of doing it – just do it.